Firecrackers and a Ferris Wheel

It seems fitting that the month that marks our one year together as a family is July.  Anjali got to experience her final big American holiday, 4th of July and we were able to celebrate in a low key way that was a lot of fun.  Anjali and her papa started the day by building a White House cookie house that I purchased from Trader Joe's.  It was a nice hands on activity that they both enjoyed.  Next it was down the street for the kids parade where the kids in our neighborhood got to decorate their bikes, scooters or strollers and parade down the street to Mordecai Mini Park where sno cones and a cotton candy and popcorn machine were waiting for the kids.  Anjali got her first taste of cotton candy and sno cones and went on the swings for a while.  We then headed home and put some hot dogs and hamburgers on the grill and had a proper Fourth of July picnic out on our front porch.   The highlight of the holiday was lighting sparklers and small firecrackers in the front yard.  Anjali squeeled with joy as she moved the sparklers in big circles and 'oohhed' and 'aahhed' as the small fireworks went off.

July was a month of healing and baby steps forward and regression.   Anjali was dealing with a lot emotionally and physically and it was often hard to know what was the source of pain and upset that she experienced on a daily basis.  She had night terrors at night, slept a lot--some days, all day and had very little appetite.  Luckily there were plenty of successes and happy moments as well.  Anjali went to her first camp--cooking camp at Marbles museum for a week.  She had a blast and made pizza, mashed potatoes, and pancakes to name a few of the creations.  It was a good way to give Anjali a chance at independence away from her parents.  She loves Marbles and after the first two days, she was eager to have me go away so she could be with her camp buddies and teachers.  Another thing that was really helpful was that we joined Lifetime Fitness in North Raleigh.  It has a nice pool and kids academy that includes Mommy and me classes.  We started off by spending short bursts of time at the pool and showed up for Mommy and me classes like Art and Crafts, Yoga and gymnastics.  Next, I left her alone in the toddler section for short periods of time and then when she told me she was ready to play with the big kids, she was moved to the open play area and also began taking kids academy classes while I got a break and a workout in the gym.  Anjali also got to go to her first American birthday party that was not her own.  She learned the important lesson that you do not just get presents, but you give others presents as well.    She got to ride a pony at the party for the first time.  Anjali also began swim lessons and continued with physical therapy.  Every day she got a little bit stronger.  Getting strong and healthy was our family motto for the summer as the year had definitely taken its toll on all of us, but absolutely no regrets.

We celebrated our one year together on July 23rd by riding our bikes to the Destination Dix Festival.  It was a really hot summer day and when we arrived we didn't think Anjali would last long, but she surprised us.   We found lots of shady spots and refreshing Italian ice.  There was an exhibition of city trucks and Anjali enjoyed climbing in the fire truck and bulldozer.  The highlight was definitely going on the ferris wheel together.  We had to wait in line for about an 45 minutes, but it's something every American kid needs to do at least once.  Anjali doesn't yet know about Disneyland or amusement parks, so this was pretty exciting for her.  We finished the day by getting some surprisingly delicious Food Truck food, I got a Korean BBQ bowl and Adam got fish and chips.  I expected Anjali to like the rice bowl, but it was the fish and chips that she loved.  After dinner, we just rolled around in the grass for a while and cherished being a family together.

As I write this last post, it is the end of August and Anjali has just finished her first week of preschool at Arts Together.  She loves it!!  Being an educator, the start of the school is always the beginning of the year rather than January for me.  And it really is the start of a new chapter in our lives as a family of three.  This first year together was an emotional and physical roller coaster for our little family.  I am amazed when I think of all that Anjali has been through and what a strong, resilient, joyful child she remains even through the many struggles her life has brought her thus far.  We are settling into a new normal now filled with gratitude and love.  We are so honored to be Anjali parents and filled with joy and pride each day as we watch her grow and live life with the sense of excitement and curiosity that makes Anjali so special.  I hope some day Anjali will read this and recall the wonderful memories and even the challenges that shaped our family and Anjali during this first year together. Most of all I hope she knows how deeply she is loved by her family and that we will alway be here to support her.  I hope she is always proud of where she comes from and what she has been through, and will use it as a source of strength through out her life.  We love you, Anjali. 

Going home again

Anjali was discharged from the hospital on June 1st and we were so relieved.  We packed up everything in Anjali's hospital room and made arrangements to get her a wheelchair to head out to the car.  I can't tell you how happy we were!  It was bittersweet for Anjali.  She was definitely ready to go, but there is a certain amount of comfort and protection she felt in the hospital and the real world out there was a bit over stimulating and scary after being there for two months.

When we got back to the Ronald McDonald House, Anjali rang the good news bell but was a bit stunned when a throng of people came out to inquire what the good news was.  We scheduled our plane tickets home and held our breath.  Adam arrived one last Friday to take us home, but then Anjali got a fever of 102, and by the time we got to the emergency room at 11pm it was at 104 and not much later we realized we wouldn't be making the trip home the following day.  It was the low point for me.  I was devastated and worried.  It would be at least 48 hours before we would get any conclusive results about what was wrong.  Luckily, it turned out to be a minor infection and we were released again on the 7th.  We booked tickets home the following day.  We all just really felt that we needed to get home.

And what a relief it was to be home! My parents were such a big help with the transition back to home.  It felt so good for all of us to be there together with the long hospital stay behind us.  Anjali especially seemed to thrive being in the familiar surroundings of home.  We quickly got her back to her favorite place, Marbles, where she could play her little heart out.

We spent much of June in the safe comfort of home taking each day as it came.  Anjali had both good and bad days and took many naps throughout the day.  She started going to physical therapy at Abilitations, which helped tremendously.  Her therapist Holly was wonderful and she loved going and tried hard for Holly.  

Another milestone this month for Anjali was going to her first movie at a movie theater.  I decided to take her to see Finding Dory.  I took her to an IMAX theater, but didn't realize it was also 3D.  Anjali sat through the hole movie and enjoyed it.  Unfortunately, she was so excited about the 3D glasses that she threw off her prescription glasses somewhere on the theater floor.  We spent about 30 minutes after the movie trying to find them to no avail.  She was very upset about losing her glasses, but loved the movie.

We were all beginning to rejuvenate after a challenging hospital stay, so glad to have this most difficult period of our lives behind us and looking forward to returning to somewhat of a normalcy at least our new normalcy as a family of three.

Mother's Day Blues

I wish I could say things got easier in May.  With Anjali's two major surgeries out of the way, we really hoped that Anjali would be on the road to recovery, but a week into May, Anjali seemed to be getting worse and worse.  Although mostly sleeping, she seemed pained and was losing a lot of weight.  Adam's mother left on the Saturday before Mother's Day and my parents arrived that evening.  They were anxious to see her and I had to relay my feelings to them that she was not doing so well to prepare them for the visit.

We visited her that night and I went back to the Ronald McDonald house for a much needed rest from a stressful week at the hospital.  I was looking forward to spending my first Mother's Day with Anjali and my mother.  But then I got a call first thing in the morning from Adam letting me know that they found an infection in the wound site and Anjali would be getting emergency surgery at noon.  My heart dropped. 

The director of the Ronald McDonald house and her family had a wonderful breakfast prepared for all the residents.  It was very touching, but my mother and I could hardly eat as we dreaded the unknowns of knowing Anjali would go back to the operating room.

Anjali's surgery went well.  Dr. Gearheart operated on her.  She had to go back to the operating room 4 more times to keep the wound clean.  From there, the process of recovery started to happen.  And she truly did seem to get better and stronger each day.   There were daily challenges and frustrations, but we were definitely acclimated to life at Johns Hopkins.  During the last week of May, Anjali was allowed to get out of the hospital bed and I was able to hold her in my arms.  It felt so good to hold her again.

What really made all the difference was having family support throughout the whole process.  My parents were there every day to lift my and Anjali's spirits and give me breaks from staying at the hospital.  They were always so positive through it all.  Anjali's other grandparents Papi and Pixie also came to visit and they were so wonderful at spending time with Anjali and their eagerness to help in anyway they could was simply heartwarming.  We are so lucky to have the loving, supportive family that we do.  They have given so much to help Anjali and start her off on the right foot.

We were all so ready to go home at the end of the month.  The end was within sight.  It was hard to believe that this challenge was almost behind us.  Anjali was so excited about the prospect of going back to her blue house in Raleigh and so was I.

Baltimore Beginnings

There is no easy way to prepare yourself or your daughter for a two month hospital stay, but we did the best we could the first week in April.  After a wonderful trip in California, Anjali was in good spirits.  We read Curious George Goes to the Hospital or  Franklin Goes to the Hospital almost every night and talked about going to the hospital.  We played hospital where Anjali performed surgery on her dolls and planned out what toys, books and clothes she would take with her.

We drove to Baltimore on April 10th and settled into our room at the Ronald McDonald house.  It was then that it truly sunk in that it was really going to happen and it was tough.  As her mother, I knew that this was the best thing for her and so grateful to be able to take Anjali to see the top surgeons in the world for her condition, but honestly, I just wanted this difficult period to hurry up and be over.  We had a couple of days to enjoy Baltimore before her surgeries.  The highlight for Anjali was going to Port Discovery, a children's museum where she enjoyed playing in the many exhibits.

The Children's Center at Johns Hopkins is world class and  we knew Anjali was in care of the most skilled hands around with surgeons Dr. Gearheart, Dr. DiCarlo and Dr. Sponseller.  Everyone at JHH was  very good at what they did and that was a huge relief.  I never imagined that there would be so many different people involved to give Anjali the best care possible--nurses, IV techs, child life specialists, hospitalists, pain management specialists, physical therapists, and nutritionists are just a few of the wonderful people that helped Anjali during her stay.  The tricky part was knowing who to ask what to and dealing with such a large stream of people coming through our room.

I thought Anjali's first surgery an osteotomy performed by Dr. Sponseller would be the most difficult, but it turned out to be pretty straightforward.  Anjali handled it all so well and was in pretty good spirits.  She was able to sit up and even got to get out of her room a couple of days in a wheelchair.  We went to the goldfish pond and to the children's library.  What was most overwhelming was getting used to life in the hospital and trying to figure out ways to best help Anjali.  The bladder closure surgery performed by Dr. DiCarlo and Dr. Gearheart which took place 2.5 weeks after the osteotomy was the far more complex procedure and much harder on Anjali. 

Luckily, I was able to basically stay with Anjali in her room.  Adam came up every Friday and stayed for the weekend.  We were also blessed to have Adam's mother come up for the first month to help us out.  She made a beautiful felt basket and flowers for Anjali.  Each day, Anjali looked forward to picking a new flower and adding it to her basket.  Little things like that were the most important in getting us through this difficult time.  Finding distractions and things that lifted her and our spirits was a daily challenge.  Anjali was a champ through it all. She handled it all much better than I would have! She is truly an inspiration and such a strong little girl.

A Birthday Party at the Trampoline House

March was an eagerly anticipated, exciting month for Anjali.  As if her 4th birthday and very first birthday party weren't enough to be excited about, Easter also fell in this month this year and brought many delightful surprises for Anjali.

Everyday Anjali asked about her party, "Party today?"  We talked about flying to California and of course,  Anjali was very excited to be going on an airplane again and more importantly everybody who was going to be there.  She would get to meet her aunts, uncle and cousins for the first time and all of her grandparents would also be there.  "Everybody's coming to California?"  Anjali asked on a regular basis.  Well not everybody, I would tell her.  Her family from India and people like Mr. Daniel her gymnastics teacher probably wouldn't be able to make it.  Her wide eyed, appreciative response, "A LOT of people love Anjali!"  

March brought in all of the beautiful spring blooms to Raleigh and quite a few bright sunny days.  Anjali has really gotten into riding her bike this month, inside and outside of the house.  We also learned that she got accepted to Arts Together preschool for next year.  It sounds like a really wonderful program sponsored by the city of Raleigh.  She will go Monday through Friday and do a mixture of drama, art, dance and music.  She is so excited about going to school and we are excited for her to go.

Anjali got to go on her first Easter Egg hunt at the Mordecai house in our neighborhood.  She wore her bunny ears and insisted on wearing her favorite pink dress.  She was a little stunned at first, but luckily was in the 3 and under group.  She got about six plastic eggs and was pleasantly surprised to find each one filled with goodies.

The week of her birthday party started with the decision of what to pack.  Anjali wanted to take all of her dresses which we didn't end up doing, but she was satisfied with the ones we did take.  The trip to California was a long one.  We had a three hour layover in Nashville then a 5 hour flight to Oakland. Anjali did really well.  Northern California is beautiful and green this time of year.  As we descended into Oakland, we got a lovely view of the velvety green hills.

My father and mother rented a lovely house in Woodacre, California.  It had a trampoline and a couple of swings that all the kids loved.  We stayed there with my brother and family.  Anjali really enjoyed spending time with her cousins, Diego, Lucy, Gemma, Giselle and Sophie.  Diego and Lucy were very eager to hang out with Anjali and they spent many hours playing in the house, on the trampoline and swinging.  We went on a short hike on Tuesday morning.  In the evening, Adam's family came over.  Anjali had a blast hanging out with Gemma and Giselle.  We went out for pizza and Anjali spent most of the time on Gemma's lap.

On Wednesday, we headed to San Francisco and tooled around Chinatown, rode a cable car and walked up and down Lombard street, the curviest steepest street in San Francisco.  Then on Thursday we went on another nice hike.  Thursday evening, Anjali got to go to the party store and pick out her party goods.  Boy, was that a thrill for her.  She picked out red and white polka dotted decorations and lots of balloons!  Adam arrived that evening and Anjali got to wake up Friday morning in his arms.

We head to the ocean on Friday morning and had a picnic lunch.  We spent the afternoon getting everything ready for Anjali's party.  Everyone chipped in to make the party extra special for Anjali and it was a huge success!

Once everyone arrived and we had time to chat and catch up and put on our birthday hats, Anjali was treated to her first birthday piñata.  Luckily her cousins were all pros and helped her out.  She loved it, especially when the candy came flying out.  Next was a big family photo followed by yummy Indian food.  

Gemma, Giselle and Aunty Tata made Anjali a delicious chocolate cake.  Anjali put on her special birthday crown and everyone sang happy birthday to her.  When it came time to blow out her candles she was ready!

After cake and ice cream, we watched the amazing video (https://vimeo.com/160624867) that Pixie made for Anjali's birthday.  We were all mesmerized.  It covered the time we were in India with Anjali and took us down memory lane.  The night ended with Anjali opening all of her presents.  She got so many lovely, thoughtful gifts from everyone.  Anjali's birthday was everything she had hoped for and more.  I am so grateful for everyone coming together to make this possible.

Next up Easter!  Anjali got to go on her second Easter egg hunt on Saturday.  It was up in the Marin hills in a place called open space.  She was now in the 4 and up category and it was definitely a more challenging Easter egg hunt.  She still got plenty of eggs.  We then headed to Gemma and Giselle's father's house to decorate eggs and finish off the Indian food from her birthday party.

Easter morning we headed to Aunty Tata's house for Easter Brunch.  It was a beautiful day and Alexandra had a wonderful feast waiting for all of us.  There were lots of kids there and Anjali had fun spending time running around with all of them.  This day also included another Easter egg hunt with the real eggs, the girls decorated.  Anjali was the only kid that thought to actually eat the eggs.  Though Shadow, Alex's dog also managed to find an egg that she promptly ate up!

The following morning we headed to the airport for a short flight to Las Vegas for a few relaxing days with Aji and Ajoba.  Anjali got to ride a gondola at the Venetian casino and be serenaded by an Italian named Pepe.  She also went to the Bellagio and enjoyed the flower garden and water fountain show.  We had a lot of fun just walking to a nearby playground and of course, enjoying Aji's yummy home cooked food.

  

On Saturday we took a flight back home and her Papa met us at the airport as he had just flown in from a work trip in Sweden.  We arrived back at the blue house at a little past midnight.  Papi and Leela greeted us with wagging tails and we were all happy to be home after a wonderful trip.